No one escapes being spoken ill of. The question is not whether it will happen — but what we do with our mind when it does. In Nepal on February 19, 2026, Master Minh Tue answered not with a restraint technique, but with a completely inverted perspective: the person being spoken ill of is actually at an advantage.
Buddhist disciple asks: When people speak ill of us, how should we restrain ourselves? (February 19, 2026 – Nepal)
Master Minh Tue answers:
If we curse back, we are more inferior than them. Thanks to their talking, we overcome it, our mind remains peaceful without greed and anger. In worldly life, many people like making others suffer to satisfy themselves, but for me, I do not wish bad things upon anyone.
I see that in life, no matter how anyone approaches me, I benefit. If they praise and give charity, I benefit and they also gain merit. Foreigners giving us shelter, so we have a place to practice, they also gain peace and tranquility.
Even those who curse and say I am a fake practitioner, I still benefit because thanks to them I can let go of my ego and learn compassion. Them digging up and destroying their wholesome roots is their own choice.
* Master Minh Tue always gives brief and concise answers suitable for the listener in each circumstance. Below is a deeper explanation and analysis so that those who wish to learn can thoroughly grasp the Master’s teachings.
The inferiority of “tit for tat”
The Master’s answer affirms a core principle of cause and effect: “If we curse back, we are more inferior than them.” The person who speaks ill of you has shown a lowly personality (inferior). If you use the same harsh words, using that same anger to retaliate, you not only fail to protect your honor but also push your character down below the level of the one harming you. The Master explores this further in his teaching on whether cursing others to protect the teacher is right.
Transforming adversity into a tool for practice (Letting go and Compassion)
This is the essence of a wise person: Seeing the “benefit” in every adversity. The Master says: “No matter how anyone approaches me, I benefit.”
- Those who praise and give charity: The Master benefits from practice support, they benefit from merit.
- Those who curse and slander: The Master benefits even more! Because “thanks to them I can let go of my ego and learn compassion.”
People praising us easily makes us arrogant (the Ego inflates). Only those who curse us help us “let go” of that Ego. Without insults, how would we know if our concentration is firm or not? How would we know if our mind still clings to worldly fame? Consider bad words as sandpaper; although the rubbing causes pain, it polishes the pearl of your soul. This perspective is closely connected to the Master’s teaching on remaining peaceful through praise and criticism.
The fair operation of Cause and Effect
Sadly for those who create evil karma, they think that uttering bitter words will hurt others. In reality, as the Master stated: “Them digging up and destroying their wholesome roots is their own choice.” When we thoroughly understand this truth, restraining ourselves is no longer painfully biting our teeth in endurance. Restraint turns into an understanding smile and a heart of boundless compassion for those who are misguided.
Have you ever found an unexpected benefit in an experience of being spoken ill of? Share your story.
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